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AP English Language — Style — Writing Drill 1

Drill 1 · Writing · Style — Writing

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About This Drill

AP English Language — Style — Writing Drill 1 is a Writing practice drill covering Style — Writing. It contains 5 original questions created by Brian Stewart, a Barron's test prep author with over 20 years of tutoring experience.

Writing drills ask you to 'read like a writer' — analyzing a student draft and choosing revisions that improve its style. Questions focus on diction, sentence variety, tone, figurative language, concision, and the overall voice of the writing.

Passage

The following is a draft of a student personal essay about learning to cook from her grandmother, written for a college application. [1] My grandmother taught me how to make her lamb stew when I was twelve years old. [2] She did not use a recipe. [3] She used her hands, her nose, and what she called "the sense of the thing." [4] I spent the next six years trying to figure out what that meant. [5] The first time I made the stew alone, I followed every step I could remember. [6] I browned the lamb. [7] I added the onions and the garlic. [8] I put in the tomatoes and the spices. [9] The stew I produced was correct in every measurable way and wrong in every way that mattered. [10] My grandmother tasted it, set down her spoon, and said, "You made it the way you read it." [11] What she meant, I eventually understood, was that I had been executing rather than cooking. [12] There is a difference. [13] Executing means following a sequence. [14] Cooking means paying attention — to how the onions smell as they soften, to the color of the oil around the spices, to whether the liquid is reducing too fast or too slow. [15] Cooking is the decision you make when something unexpected happens and you don't have a recipe to consult. [16] I thought about this a lot in the two years after my grandmother passed away. [17] I cooked her stew many times. [18] Each time, it got closer to hers and further from my first attempt. [19] I don't think I will ever make it the way she made it. [20] I am not sure I am supposed to. [21] What I learned in that kitchen was not a recipe. [22] It was a way of being present with something difficult and uncertain and refusing to stop until it became what it was supposed to be. [23] I have tried to bring that disposition with me into every room I enter.

Questions in This Drill

  1. The writer wants to revise sentences 6–8 to create a more vivid and rhythmically effective description of the cooking steps. Which revision best accomplishes this?
  2. The writer wants to revise sentence 11 — 'What she meant, I eventually understood, was that I had been executing rather than cooking' — to make this moment of realization feel more earned and less mechanical. Which revision best accomplishes this?
  3. The writer wants to revise sentences 16 and 17 to vary the sentence structure and create more emotional resonance. Which revision best accomplishes this?
  4. The writer wants to revise sentence 22 — 'It was a way of being present with something difficult and uncertain and refusing to stop until it became what it was supposed to be' — to make the sentence more syntactically varied and precise. Which revision best accomplishes this?
  5. The writer wants the final sentence — 'I have tried to bring that disposition with me into every room I enter' — to close the essay with more specificity and resonance. Which revision best accomplishes this?